Friday, June 13, 2014


I am not pregnant this month.  While not jumping for joy over this development, it's ultimately not going to send me into fits of tears.  I am instead trying to view this month through the prism of opportunity: an extra month to jack up my vitamin D intake, not to mention the disgusting new prenatals I now take (with the non-synthetic version of folate), the Ubiquinol, and the what Niblet calls the daily morning  "make a baby smoothie."

I have no idea when my period will come, but I *really* would love an appearance before wednesday.  That day I am traveling with a very excited Niblet to see my parents.  As you can imagine, we can't sacrifice the trip, IUI pressure or not.  But the sooner I can get an IUI rolling this month, the better.  So now comes the point in the cycle where I say, "All right universe, I am not pregnant.  Let's start this over asap, mmmokay?"

I am also seeing that we all need to move forward quickly in my house, and learn one way or another whether this quest is just doomed.  This morning, Niblet - who has an array of imaginary siblings (Aurora, Marina and Diego, in case you were wondering) - tore my heart in half when she said the following while munching on her pancake: "(Sigh) Mommy, I am tired of my imaginary sisters and brothers.  I really want a real one."

I hear you kid.  God, how I hear you.

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