Monday, October 14, 2013

Down the Rabbit Hole

Today I saw my RE to discuss my wonky periods.  Needless to say, I'm headed down an incredibly dreary path that will be recognizable to other women my age.  The good news:  a "beautiful" uterus (not something us AS gals hear too often) and one decent ovary that likely has an appropriate number of eggs for a gal my age. 

The bad news:  one "puny" ovary that is very likely putting me on the path of Diminished Ovarian Reserve (DOR).  I get to look forward to progesterone testing in exactly 2 weeks, and then more detailed hormonal testing two weeks after that to determine just how realistic is for my aging ovaries to knock a healthy egg out.  Depending on the outcomes of that testing, there could be some highly uncomfortable conversations in my future about what lengths I want to take medically to conceive.

I never imagined I would be in this position, hell, few women do.  About 18 months ago we formally started down the road to giving niblet a much wanted sibling.  While I certainly rationalized that a miscarriage could result from a pregnancy, I never imagined that I would lose over a year of my fertility in the process.  I certainly could never envision two medically complicated miscarriages, one with an instruction to stall trying to conceive for over 6 months of time.  That time I lost could have well turned out to be crucial. 

And it's hitting me that both internally and out, I have a very different body from the one I started out with those 18 months ago.  My obsessive exercising has done little to shed the weight of my last pregnancy, and it's not lost on me that I am walking on crutches right now, without any clear idea of how long my recovery will be.

Whoa.  This is a total bummer.

With that, I am off to my first acupuncture session.

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